A Sexy Recipe for Consent

The host and guest of a cooking show talk about the ingredients needed to ensure that both intimate partners can consent to sex.

For all videos in this unit:

  • What did you see in the video?
  • What do you think this video was about?
  • What stood out to you the most in this video?
  • What are the beliefs that our society/your culture has on consent? What have you been taught about the way someone should initiate a sexual activity with another person?

For this video:

  • How is this “cooking show” different from the way consent is portrayed in real media (TV shows, movies, music videos, etc.)?
  • What were some of the ingredients mentioned in this video?
  • What were some examples they showed of how to ask for consent in a sexy way?
  • What is consent? (Allow the class to create their own definition. Write it down where the class can see and reference it for the activity. For a comprehensive definition of consent, refer to Planned Parenthood’s definition.)
  • Who should get asked for consent? Who should ask for consent?

In this activity, students use popular songs as a base for conveying information about sexual health.

Step 1.
Split your class into five groups.

Step 2.
Explain that the class has been invited to perform at the Sex Ed Grammy Awards.

Step 3.
Explain that each of the five groups must take a song that they know and re-write the lyrics to that song so that it is about consent.

Step 4.
Explain that the song should be between one and two minutes in length and everyone in the group has to perform at least one line of the song.

Step 5.
Find the Top 5 songs on the Billboard Hot 100 List. Assign each group one of the songs to re-write. (It may help to allow students to look up the songs/lyrics on their phones. You can also print the lyrics of the songs for each of the groups to reference ahead-of-class.)

Step 6.
As the student groups create, go around to each group, check in with them to make sure they are on task, and see where in the process they are. Help them refer to the definition of consent that the class created together earlier if they are struggling with the lyrics. Encourage them to get on their feet once they’ve finished writing.

Step 7.
Have the students take down specific lyrics that they find interesting as the groups perform so that they can share them later in the discussion.

Step 8.
Have each group come to the front of the classroom, state the name of their song, and then perform their song.

Step 9.
Be sure to applaud before and after each performance! Make sure that the class is being respectful of each group’s work. When the final group has performed, have everyone return to their seats.

Step 10.
Debrief the exercise with your students. Have the students share what they found interesting about doing the exercises and hearing their fellow groups’ lyrics.

Step 1.
Have students stand in a circle. Ask for a volunteer and have them participate in an example, demonstrating how the game works.

Explain that for the walk, one person looks at another in the circle and asks “Can I walk to you?” If they say no, they have to stay where they are and ask someone else. If they say yes, the person can walk to them. While the person is walking towards them, they make eye contact with a third person and ask, “Can I walk to you?” They have to wait until they receive a “yes” in order to leave their spot, and must try to leave their spot before the person who is walking towards them arrives.

Step 2.
Have students play the game, making sure that they do not start walking before getting a “yes” from the person they are walking towards.

Step 3.
Reflect on the experience of playing the game, and how it relates to various ways consent shows up in sexual health.